My cat is a ridiculous animal

I have an Abyssinian. Her name is Blue. She is a retired model (ex show cat) that I was suckered into adopting. She's about the sweetest cat I've ever known, but she's insane. She only weighs about 2-2.3 kg (about 5#) & I think she's about 10 yrs old, but she acts like a 4 month old kitten. She is so unbelievably weird. She loves to chase the laser pointer, dust bunnies, paper, string, whatever. Sometimes she bats around invisible objects. I often wonder what exactly is going on in her tiny little walnut-sized brain, but I then remember that I probably don't want to know.
She is missing one of her canine (fangs) teeth, on the right side of her jaw. She drools when she purrs. She purrs all the time, or at least when she is in range of a human. The missing canine tooth allows the drool to run out of her mouth a little, which I believe tickles her. The tickling of the drool causes her to shake her tiny little head, flinging cat saliva all over the victim. She likes to get on people & 'make biscuits' on them, preferring areas such as the groin, or directly on the stomach right after you've eaten a large meal. And let me tell you from experience, it is less than pleasant. You see there is an equation that states that a cat's body weight is multiplied by some absurd factor when they are standing on certain sensitive area. It is an ability that cats alone possess that is a result of them being able to make themselves physically as dense as the center of a neutron star. Full stomach, sunburn, groin, whatever. These are all favorite & acceptable areas for cats to make biscuits, or knead the victim, all the while purring & appearing generally sweet as if they are there for your benefit, rather than your detriment. "What's that? I just ruptured your right testicle? But I'm being sweet & affectionate! How ever could this have come to pass? Oh deary me." That's what they're thinking. Trust me on this one. This cat is endlessly entertaining & I have no doubt that she will be the subject of future posts.
Top picture: Blue Cat takin' a bath in my recliner
Bottom picture: Blue Cat & Yukon the Space Husky checking out the prey out my back door.